Friday, February 27, 2009

Latest Jokes

The Perfect Son.
A: I have the perfect son.
B: Does he smoke?
A: No, he doesn't.
B: Does he drink whiskey?
A: No, he doesn't.
B: Does he ever come home late?
A: No, he doesn't.
B: I guess you really do have the perfect son. How old is he?
A: He will be six months old next Wednesday.

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A family of mice were surprised by a big cat. Father Mouse jumped and and said, "Bow-wow!" The cat ran away. "What was that, Father?" asked Baby Mouse. "Well, son, that's why it's important to learn a second language."
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The doctor to the patient: 'You are very sick'
The patient to the doctor: 'Can I get a second opinion?'
The doctor again: 'Yes, you are very ugly too...
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A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, wherever I touch, it hurts."
The doctor asks, "What do you mean?"
The man says, "When I touch my shoulder, it really hurts. If I touch my knee - OUCH! When I touch my forehead, it really, really hurts."
The doctor says, "I know what's wrong with you - you've broken your finger!"
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Patient: Doctor, I have a pain in my eye whenever I drink tea.
Doctor: Take the spoon out of the mug before you drink.
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Patient: Doctor! You've got to help me! Nobody ever listens to me. No one ever pays any attention to what I have to say.
Doctor: Next please!
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Two boys were arguing when the teacher entered the room.
The teacher says, "Why are you arguing?"

One boy answers, "We found a ten dollor bill and decided to give it to whoever tells the biggest lie."

"You should be ashamed of yourselves," said the teacher, "When I was your age I didn't even know what a lie was."

The boys gave the ten dollars to the teacher.
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A snail walks into a bar and the barman tells him there's a strict policy about having snails in the bar and so kicks him out. A year later the same snail re-enters the bar and asks the barman "What did you do that for?"
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Mother: "Did you enjoy your first day at school?"
Girl: "First day? Do you mean I have to go back tomorrow?
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Teacher: "Nick, what is the past participle of the verb to ring?"
Nick: "What do you think it is, Sir?"
Teacher: "I don't think, I KNOW!"
Nick: "I don't think I know either, Sir!"
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A: Why are you crying?
B: The elephant is dead.
A: Was he your pet?
B: No, but I'm the one who must dig his grave
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A teenage girl had been talking on the phone for about half an hour, and then she hung up.
"Wow!," said her father, "That was short. You usually talk for two hours. What happened?"

"Wrong number," replied the girl.

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Alternative Endings

I always like to do alternative endings in my class. It’s something that can challenge my students’ creativities besides letting them discuss and show their capabilities to produce their own masterpiece. What I normally do is, I will ask my students to sit in small groups and try to come out with an alternative ending of certain stories that we have discussed earlier. In my case, since I teach form 5 students, I like to do alternative endings on the short stories like The Lotus Eater and even The Necklace. And sometimes, I would also ask them to think their own version of The Pearl, on how it supposed to end.
Talking about The Pearl, most of my students, past and present do not really like its ending. They always think that Kino and his family deserved something much better after all that they have gone through. Some of them suggested Kino not to throw away the pearl, instead keeping it and start a new life, and many more versions. Yesterday, I did this alternative ending activity in one of my form5 classes, and I promised to publish the best version in my blog. So the group winner is comprised of Nur Amalina, Rayhana, Mastika, Suhaina and Fiona Farhain from 5 Nilam. This is their version of alternative ending to The Pearl which starts after Kino stopped Juana from throwing away the pearl.

Kino hits Juana’s face and kicks her in the side because Juana wants to throw away the pearl. Later, Juana managed to take the pearl away from Kino after he was unconscious being attacked by an unknown attacker. Juana makes up her mind. She brings Coyotito and the pearl with her. They went to the sea by Kino’s only canoe and in the middle of the sea; Juana throws away the pearl far from her sight.
After regaining his consciousness, Kino tries to find Juana and his son but to no avail. He even asks for help from his brother, Juan Tomas to search for his missing wife and son.
Juana and Coyotito were somewhere in the middle of the sea when suddenly she realizes that she does not really know where she should go. This is the first time in her life that she is ever miles apart from her husband. After makes up her mind, she then decides to return back to her husband because she feels really sorry for her action.
Unfortunately, before she even starts her journey back, heavy rains fall down and Juana finds it difficult to steer her canoe and before she is able to stabilize the canoe, Coyotito suddenly fell into the sea. Juana quickly jumps to save her baby. However, she could not find him. Out of a sudden, a big wave hits Juana and makes her unconscious.
It has been two days the last time Kino sees Juana. He feels very lonely and the loneliness has made him a different man. He becomes quiet and likes to sit alone. He even does not take his food and locks himself in his house. On the third day, Juan Tomas finds the dead body of Kino in his room clutching the shirt of Coyotito. At the very same day, the villagers find the body of Juana and Coyotito at the shore, lying closed to each other.

Monday, January 12, 2009

It was a worth game to watch last nite..eventhough i had to go to school early in the morning but it was a worth waiting game at 12 am when you could see your favourite team Man Utd beat the so called Big 4, Chelsea. It was a well deserved win where Man Utd can easily score 4-5 goals. We still have two games in hand and hopefully by the end of the month we will be at the top of the league again. My man of the match should go to the ever industrious Park Ji Sung and the ever so reliable and strong Nermanda Vidic..Glory, glory Man Utd..Chelsea who..hua hua hua...

Thursday, January 8, 2009

I found some collection of jokes in the net in which i would like to share with you. Mind you, all of them are clean jokes ok..:)

Teacher: Maria please point to America on the map.
Maria: This is it.
Teacher: Well done. Now class, who found America?
Class: Maria did.


A: Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?
B: Yes I am, I married the wrong woman.


A man was pulled over for driving too fast, even though he thought he was driving just fine.

Officer: You were speeding.
Man: No, I wasn't.
Officer: Yes, you were. I'm giving you a ticket.
Man: But I wasn't speeding.
Officer: Tell that to the judge! (The officer gives man the ticket.)
Man: Would I get another ticket if I called you a jerk?
Officer: Yes, you would.
Man: What if I just thought that you were?
Officer: I can't give you a ticket for what you think.
Man: Fine, I think you're a jerk!


What are the three quickest ways of spreading a rumour (or gossip).
1.Telegram
2.Telephone
3.Tell a woman


If you give a man a fish, he eats for a day.
If you teach a man to fish, he can always eat.
If you give a man a fire, he's warm for a day.
If you light a man on fire, he is warm for the rest of his life.


A: Did you hear that a baby was fed on elephant's milk and gained twenty pounds in a week.
B: That's impossible. Whose baby?
A: An elephant's.


When I was young I didn't like going to weddings.
My grandmother would tell me, "You're next"
However, she stopped doing that after I started saying the same thing to her at funerals.


A: I'm in a big trouble!
B: Why is that?
A: I saw a mouse in my house!
B: Oh, well, all you need to do is use a trap.
A: I don't have one.
B: Well then, buy one.
A: Can't afford one.
B: I can give you mine if you want.
A: That sounds good.
B: All you need to do is just use some cheese in order to make the mouse come to the trap.
A: I don't have any cheese.
B: Okay then, take a piece of bread and put a bit of oil in it and put it in the trap.
A: I don't have oil.
B: Well, then put only a small piece of bread.
A: I don't have bread.
B: Then what is the mouse doing at your house?!


Fred is 32 years old and he is still single.

One day a friend asked, "Why aren't you married? Can't you find a woman who will be a good wife?"

Fred replied, "Actually, I've found many women I wanted to marry, but when I bring them home to meet my parents, my mother doesn't like them."

His friend thinks for a moment and says, "I've got the perfect solution, just find a girl who's just like your mother."

A few months later they meet again and his friend says, "Did you find the perfect girl? Did your mother like her?"

With a frown on his face, Fred answers, "Yes, I found the perfect girl. She was just like my mother. You were right, my mother liked her very much."

The friend said, "Then what's the problem?"

Fred replied, "My father doesn't like her."

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

It's been a week now since we welcome 2009, and of course the Ma'al Hijrah as well.When talking about new year, people always ask on our new year resolution and stuff like that. For me, i never have any new resolution. I did once try to have a resolution before, but before i knew, i realised that i ended that year without even remember what in the world my new resolution was..ever since then, when new year comes, i always tell myself that i want to be better than last year...better in terms of everything..profession, family life, financial and of course my well being as a person. Resolution can only guide you but it is only you who knows whether or not you can fulfil or achieve it.
Yesterday (January 5th) was the first day of school..my mind and my body seem to be very reluctant to go to school yesterday after weeks of holidays. I used to wake up around 8 when suddenly i need to be ready before even my son wakes me up. Usually it takes me few days to adjust and hopefully it won't last until weeks or months. It's a new chapter as well for me as a teacher. I will be having a new batches of students with a new piles of problems and excitement. But, i'll live with it..this is my life and i have to deal with it..so, happy new year to everyone. Just be better than yesterday and good luck in whatever thing that you are doing right now..see ya..

Monday, December 22, 2008

Where are you now?

It's been a very busy week with plenty of things to be done and completed on schedule. I don't even have a time to watch my favourite team Man Utd played the final game of the Fifa Club World Cup yesterday. Luckily they won, or else I would be having sleepless nights again. I don't know, but everytime Man Utd lost or something, normally i couldn't shut my eyes on that particulary night. It's not being a fanatic but probabaly I love this team so much..
New year is approaching, and as always people will ask you on your new year's resolution. For me, it's always been the same every year, which is to better person than before. You can say it's a cliche, but that's my resolution every year. What about you guys? Anyway, i'm putting the title of this artice as where are you know because i want to know the whereabouts of all my former students. So, if you read this, please leave your name and whereabouts now in the comment section. You can leave your hp no or email as well. I just want to know your well being now..ok..so, till we meet again..

Saturday, December 6, 2008


السلام عليكم Isnin ni (10 zulhijjah - 8 Disember)semua umat Islam di seluruh dunia akan menyambut Hari Raya Aidiladha yang juga dikenali sebagai raya haji ataupun raya korban. Apapun gelarannya, selalunya raya ni tidaklah semeriah raya puasa atau raya aidilfitri. Biasanya, kuih atau lauk pun taklah banyak. Yang banyak cuma daging korban yang disedekahkan. So, selalunya saya sendiri pun akan muakla memakan daging2 ni semua setiap kali menyambut raya korban. Tapi yang penting untuk kita fikirkan ialah apakah signifikan ibadah korban tu di dalam kehidupan seharian kita umat Islam ni. Dan bagi yang mempunyai saudara mara terdekat yang sedang menunaikan ibadah haji di Mekkah sekarang ni, tentunya sambutan raya haji ni lebih2 lagi tak meriah. Yang penting doakan saja agar mereka kembali dengan membawa haji yang mabrur dan bukannya pulang membawa terlalu banyak ole2 dari Mekkah. Saya sendiri pernah menerima teko yang dibawa oleh jemaah haji dari Mekkah ni. Teko tu memanglah cantik tapi selepas dibelek2, ianya Made in China..so, entahlah..Lu pikirla sendiri..kalau air zam2 tu lainlah ceritanya..akhir kata, Salam AidilAdha buat semua especially kepada semua my students,ex-students, friends and families. Semoga terus menjadi insan yang lebih baik daripada semalam..