Friday, February 27, 2009

Latest Jokes

The Perfect Son.
A: I have the perfect son.
B: Does he smoke?
A: No, he doesn't.
B: Does he drink whiskey?
A: No, he doesn't.
B: Does he ever come home late?
A: No, he doesn't.
B: I guess you really do have the perfect son. How old is he?
A: He will be six months old next Wednesday.

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A family of mice were surprised by a big cat. Father Mouse jumped and and said, "Bow-wow!" The cat ran away. "What was that, Father?" asked Baby Mouse. "Well, son, that's why it's important to learn a second language."
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The doctor to the patient: 'You are very sick'
The patient to the doctor: 'Can I get a second opinion?'
The doctor again: 'Yes, you are very ugly too...
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A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, wherever I touch, it hurts."
The doctor asks, "What do you mean?"
The man says, "When I touch my shoulder, it really hurts. If I touch my knee - OUCH! When I touch my forehead, it really, really hurts."
The doctor says, "I know what's wrong with you - you've broken your finger!"
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Patient: Doctor, I have a pain in my eye whenever I drink tea.
Doctor: Take the spoon out of the mug before you drink.
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Patient: Doctor! You've got to help me! Nobody ever listens to me. No one ever pays any attention to what I have to say.
Doctor: Next please!
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Two boys were arguing when the teacher entered the room.
The teacher says, "Why are you arguing?"

One boy answers, "We found a ten dollor bill and decided to give it to whoever tells the biggest lie."

"You should be ashamed of yourselves," said the teacher, "When I was your age I didn't even know what a lie was."

The boys gave the ten dollars to the teacher.
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A snail walks into a bar and the barman tells him there's a strict policy about having snails in the bar and so kicks him out. A year later the same snail re-enters the bar and asks the barman "What did you do that for?"
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Mother: "Did you enjoy your first day at school?"
Girl: "First day? Do you mean I have to go back tomorrow?
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Teacher: "Nick, what is the past participle of the verb to ring?"
Nick: "What do you think it is, Sir?"
Teacher: "I don't think, I KNOW!"
Nick: "I don't think I know either, Sir!"
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A: Why are you crying?
B: The elephant is dead.
A: Was he your pet?
B: No, but I'm the one who must dig his grave
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A teenage girl had been talking on the phone for about half an hour, and then she hung up.
"Wow!," said her father, "That was short. You usually talk for two hours. What happened?"

"Wrong number," replied the girl.

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Alternative Endings

I always like to do alternative endings in my class. It’s something that can challenge my students’ creativities besides letting them discuss and show their capabilities to produce their own masterpiece. What I normally do is, I will ask my students to sit in small groups and try to come out with an alternative ending of certain stories that we have discussed earlier. In my case, since I teach form 5 students, I like to do alternative endings on the short stories like The Lotus Eater and even The Necklace. And sometimes, I would also ask them to think their own version of The Pearl, on how it supposed to end.
Talking about The Pearl, most of my students, past and present do not really like its ending. They always think that Kino and his family deserved something much better after all that they have gone through. Some of them suggested Kino not to throw away the pearl, instead keeping it and start a new life, and many more versions. Yesterday, I did this alternative ending activity in one of my form5 classes, and I promised to publish the best version in my blog. So the group winner is comprised of Nur Amalina, Rayhana, Mastika, Suhaina and Fiona Farhain from 5 Nilam. This is their version of alternative ending to The Pearl which starts after Kino stopped Juana from throwing away the pearl.

Kino hits Juana’s face and kicks her in the side because Juana wants to throw away the pearl. Later, Juana managed to take the pearl away from Kino after he was unconscious being attacked by an unknown attacker. Juana makes up her mind. She brings Coyotito and the pearl with her. They went to the sea by Kino’s only canoe and in the middle of the sea; Juana throws away the pearl far from her sight.
After regaining his consciousness, Kino tries to find Juana and his son but to no avail. He even asks for help from his brother, Juan Tomas to search for his missing wife and son.
Juana and Coyotito were somewhere in the middle of the sea when suddenly she realizes that she does not really know where she should go. This is the first time in her life that she is ever miles apart from her husband. After makes up her mind, she then decides to return back to her husband because she feels really sorry for her action.
Unfortunately, before she even starts her journey back, heavy rains fall down and Juana finds it difficult to steer her canoe and before she is able to stabilize the canoe, Coyotito suddenly fell into the sea. Juana quickly jumps to save her baby. However, she could not find him. Out of a sudden, a big wave hits Juana and makes her unconscious.
It has been two days the last time Kino sees Juana. He feels very lonely and the loneliness has made him a different man. He becomes quiet and likes to sit alone. He even does not take his food and locks himself in his house. On the third day, Juan Tomas finds the dead body of Kino in his room clutching the shirt of Coyotito. At the very same day, the villagers find the body of Juana and Coyotito at the shore, lying closed to each other.